THE DAY WHEN SELFIE RUINED VALENTINES

it was quite an unusual day for me and my alien counterparts........oh yeah in case u have forgotten I come from mars and have been generously adopted by my earthly parents
my sister on the other hands, unfortunately, turns out to be a normal human girl and thus we both live in conflicting dream places!
she has that total craze for the valentines week which starts with some stupid rose day followed by murderous kiss days [ eww...look at all the germs u are transferring] and even when all this melodrama doesn't make the boys shell out the last mahatma Gandhi from their pockets comes the freaky valentines day on 14th ...[which is in some regions also known as matri pitri divas in case having a chappal 365 days wasn't enough...hehheee...]...by the way certain aliens like chocolate day even if it means dragging your parents all along the reliance freshmart store to buy you a silk and they end up negotiating with a packet of gems :)
so if all this wasn't rubbish enough to laugh my asses off, my darling friend riya sahni [ u remember her? no....? then go back somewhere down and read the post where I first mentioned her...dont wanna go? it's alright! i love to give exaggerated descriptions of my earth friends,  RIYA SAHNI a girl so confident who can intimidate rickshaw walas with her voice to teachers by making her eyes explode out of the eye sockets and is besotted with every cute guy she sees. guys can not really handle such an outgoing personality and poor riya is left  to celebrate the valentines all alone with making extravagance plans for her wedding! unique? ain't she?

so i have noticed a pattern or kinds of people i encounter during the love week
1 THE BLISSFULLY HAPPY
these are the people who make everyone believe in love stories...romantic and beautiful such couples tend to inspire people to go and give love a shot
2 THE COMPARATIVE COUPLE
for these people love is directly proportional to the amount of money spent and getting forward in the race with their friends and leave no stone unturned in showing off
3 THE DESPERATE TINDERS
for these people love doesn't matters, all that is imp is to not be lonely on the overhyped valentines day [ i sometimes feel valentines day is equal to DU's north campus....worthless and hyped for nothing valuable]
4 I HATE VALENTINES DAY
such people show how they are proud to be single [or rather they tried but couldn't hold on to their relation] and u can see them roaming on whats app and facebook posting stupid memes on "how i am lucky to spend time with my pillow, ha ! as in the rest days of years u spend is using towels during sleep na
5 VALENTINES? HAHAHA...BABY FEED ME FOOD
Welcome to my category ...such people rather tend to sleep the whole day and tend to throw tantrums at mom for not making rajma chawal and if by chance stumble across any valentines wish, they are like.....really? me? or are u sure u sent it to the right person?
for them cribbing at mom to make her buy u gems and telling ur family that u love them is more imp than crying in the blanket for being single
such people are more in favor of kick and slap days ...trust me...its way better..u get to kick ur sibling in the ass for being an asshole and if u r lucky enough u might just paste " i am a donkey kick me" on the back of their school uniform



so HELL YEAHHH,
lets come to the main story
5 days before valentines we all decided to go to Preet vihar for some ngo orientation.....while boarding the metro riya saw a real handsome hunk and for her it was love, at first, sight....tall, dusky, dimpled smile, he was perfect in every sense
3 stations passed riya was practically swooning over him in her dreams completely oblivious that  one of our girls was fighting with her boyfriend for not calling her @ 12....[ god these girls....seriously? i empathize with the guys...who the hell calls @ 12 just to say, baby, i love u... or darling u r the only girl whom i have ever dreamt of even a while ago he must have said the same during a sunny leone movie]
but riya in her own world was trying everything to get his attention, suddenly the train halted and we all jerked backward...riya purposefully dropped her wallet and as expected the chivalrous guy bent down to get it for her....
she smiled meekly and thanked him, and maybe took the opportunity to talk it out to him....and trust me riya is real good in making people feel comfortable and extract out personal info....in no time we all girls and 1 alien got to know that he usually boarded the metro @ 8 am and got off the Rajiv chowk station for his MBA classes
woah.....the chicas got speed :P
so obviously if u know riya well by now u can easily anticipate her next move...she made us all board the metro @ 8 am and went 1 station extra just to see him...and if she is not wrong once or twice he even waved at her and smiled flirtatiously and then got back into his phone
this went on about a day was left for the valentines
bhavya , shivi, and adu convinced her that she should ask him out...[as if riya hadn't thought about it na?!]
when riya asked me, i couldn't give her my true opinion as i was busy indulging in the burger kings combo @ 67 where they give u a burger, fries and coke with a cute little paper crown...isnt it amazing!
so practically chewing the crumbs and drinking my fresh coffee i said "jaa riya jee le Apni Zindagi" sarcastically and the girls didn't bother me again [food helps man...see]
so finally after a lot of hues and cries it was decided riya would confront the MBA man on 14th at 8 am
the next day, riya looked stunning [and if u tell her she is like " i look stunning everyday ..haa"]
with the black dress and ethnic earrings she looked like a girlfriend material, Vibhu convinced riya into buying a silk [200 wali! these guys are kidding me...within 200 we could have ordered at least 4 combos of burger king...man! they wasted it i feel bad now]
so we were fortunate enough to be in the same metro as him, finally at Rajiv chowk we all got off....keeping me at behind as i could not shut my mouth from saying that it was a bad idea....
so riya went up to the guy " hey...."
" hi"
"umm....so any plans for today?"
" don't mind but u look good" [yeah yeah shivi and bhavya are gleaming with happiness...their magic spell worked ....bleh]
" yeah...i know ....thanks"
" so?....u stopped me? something urgent? u ok?"
" umm actually i don't know how to say this but i think i might have fallen for you...u are like the perfect guy i have ever seen...and"
" hey..hey, stop stop...what are u saying? i don't even know u!"
" hahahahaaaaaa" no , that was me laughing behind and all the girls glared me as if i have murdered somebody
" but ..but...remember u smiled at me for 3 continuous days and even waved me and stared at me for quite a while ...its only yesterday that u flirtatiously smiled at me and then got back to ur phone and kept on checking me in between...i mean...god!"
"look maam, i am sorry, it might have been a misunderstanding...i was smiling and then looking into the phone as i was clicking a selfie....here...see?" and he showed evidence for his innocence
" KATTA HOGYA!" i burped a little louder and suddenly felt a tinge of pain in my ass ...shivi just kicked me.....ye to gyi
" would u two stop" Sneha and aditi scolded us
"so u were clicking selfies i get that but why were u checking me out then?"
" no i wasn't ....actually ...god...i never even told this to my friends ..i cant believe i am telling it to a total stranger....the thing is i am in a long distance relationship so we skype everyday before i go to classes as it suits both of us that's why i was smiling into the phone as she had proposed me 4 days back ....."
"CHOUPSEY.....HAHAHAAA" I had completely gone bonkers....
" nishi tere mai akal hai? reflexes theek hain? tujhe pata nhi h kab hasna chahiye? shivi take her away before riya kills her" bhavya reprimanded

" oh...okay..i am sorry to bother you...." riya was almost on the verge of crying
" umm...i know it might sOund ridiculous but i see u have brought a chocolate for me...actually i am gonna meet my love in 10 mins and i haven't bought her anything...i mean if you could..."
"YOU ASSHOLE.....JERK...instead of apologizing you are asking for a 3 times burger king meal" i screamed " leave her alone before i use my superpowers" [ok fine...i am possessive about people i care no matter how much fun i make of them ...and it was hurting to see your girl disappointed at valentines]
"its fine nishi, he can have it...at least someones valentines should be perfect...go ahead" she smiled weakly at him
he said sorry and rushed to meet his girlfriend
"riya i am so proud of you" sneha pitched
"yeah we all are!" the girls said
" NO....I AM NOT who the hell gives away 235/- chocolate to a stranger..mujhe hi dedete....idiots"
riya stared at me for a while and started laughing frantically and out of nowhere they all piled and hugged me
" ewwww...not in public place atleast" i and sneha said
" chal...ajaaa....burger king chalte hain"i suggested
and all i know they all were running behind me threatning to hit and smack me today:)












"why the hell is she laughing?" my dad frowned
"must be seeing a stupid dream again" mom defended
"aap didi ko kahan se laye ho? " my sister was practically sure i am mad
" MARS SE" i replied in my sleep
how did u find it?
please letme know by commenting down below....if it managed to make u smile ...then...HURRAH! MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
KEEP SMILING:)